Lifestyle

Unlearning the Relationship Myths We Grew Up With

Published

12 months ago

19 June 2025

From childhood to adulthood, we’ve been taught so many ideas about love and relationships—through our parents, religious teachings, cultural norms, and Nollywood. Some of these beliefs are helpful, but many are myths that lead to confusion, pain, and unrealistic expectations. In Nigeria, where love and family are held in high regard, it’s time we start unlearning the relationship myths we grew up with—and replace them with healthier truths.

“True Love Conquers All”

We grew up hearing that as long as you truly love someone, everything would somehow work out. But in reality, love by itself isn’t always enough. You can love someone deeply and still struggle with communication, clashing values, financial stress, or personal growth. Thinking love fixes everything can make you overlook real issues that need to be addressed. Yes, love is the foundation—but it needs honesty, respect, and effort to thrive.

“Marriage Is the Ultimate Goal”

In Nigerian society, Marriage is often seen as a final achievement or prize. Once a woman reaches a certain age, family members start asking, “When are you getting married?” But the truth is, marriage is not the end goal of life. It’s a journey shared with another person, not a final stop. Rushing into marriage to meet expectations or or avoid pressure can lead to unhappy unions. It’s okay to focus on personal growth, build your career, or take time to heal before choosing a life partner.

“You Must Marry Within Your Tribe or Religion”

This myth still persists in many homes. Some families believe love should only happen within your tribe or faith. But love often defies those boundaries. People from different backgrounds can have strong, happy relationships if they share the same values and are willing to respect each other’s differences. While family input is important, your happiness and peace should come first. Love should be about connection, not just culture.

“One Person Must Always Lead”

Traditionally, we’re taught that the man leads while the woman follows. But in today’s world, a relationship should feel like teamwork. Decisions should be made together, with both partners feeling heard. Whether it’s finances, parenting, or life plans, both voices matter. Respect and understanding make relationships stronger—not control.

“Jealousy Means You Care”

Many people mistake jealousy for love. Some believe if their partner isn’t jealous, then they must not care. But jealousy often comes from fear and insecurity, not love. Monitoring phones, interrogating, or arguing over harmless friendships can damage trust. Real love is built on trust, not control. If something is bothering you, have an open conversation instead of jumping to conclusions.

“Stay No Matter What” vs. “Leave at the First Fight”

We’ve often been stuck between two extremes. Some believe you should stay no matter what—even when it’s toxic. Others think that any problem means it’s time to leave. But the truth lies somewhere in between. Not every argument means the relationship should end, and not every relationship should be saved. The key is learning to tell the difference. If the issues are fixable, work through them together. If the relationship becomes harmful, it’s okay to walk away.

How to Unlearn These Myths

Unlearning doesn’t happen overnight. It starts by asking yourself where your beliefs came from and whether they’re still serving you in a healthy way. Talk with people you trust about what you’re discovering. Watch couples who have balanced and honest relationships—not perfect couples, but real, emotionally honest ones. Set clear boundaries for what you want in love, and communicate them with your partner. Listen more. Talk openly. When you both navigate conflict or tough conversations with more care, celebrate those moments.

Love is beautiful—but to truly enjoy it, we must unlearn the myths we’ve been told.

The truth is, every relationship is different. What works for others might not suit you—and that’s perfectly fine.

By letting go of beliefs like “love conquers all” or “marry before you run out of time,” you give yourself a better chance at finding real, lasting happiness. Choose what works for you.

Build a love that fits your heart—not just society’s script.

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Lifestyle

The Nigerian It Girls of YouTube.

Published

3 days ago

8 June 2026

Destiny Echobu

Photo: Instagram

There’s a new wave quietly dominating Nigerian YouTube mostly in lifestyle content. The Nigerian IT Girls of YouTube are known for their realistic style, personality, consistency and how they present their everyday lives in a way that feels natural and relatable.

Some of these IT Girls include;

Diana Eneje

Photo: Instagram

Diana is often one of the leading examples when people talk about Nigerian IT Girls. She has mastered the art of making everything look effortless and real, and built a movie-like world that feels aspirational and endlessly watched. She began her career as a teen model in 2016. She is a prominent figure in Nigerian influencer culture.

Frances Theodore

Photo: Instagram

Frances Theodore a Nigerian digital creator and influencer is also part of this new wave of creators. She began to gain public attention as a content creator around the late 2010s, where she started consistently posting lifestyle and fashion content. She stands out as a modern influencer, her blend of ambition and authenticity makes her the kind of creator people aspire.

Amy Okoli

Photo: Instagram

Amy Okoli is a Nigerian lifestyle content creator, model and a social media influencer known for her exceptional vlogs and lifestyle beauty contents. Her journey began in 2018, when she officially launched her YouTube channel and started posting lifestyle vlogs consistently. She has grown to be one of the established Gen Z influencers.

Danielle Diana Dubem

Photo: Instagram

Danielle Diana Dubem popularly known as D3 is a Lagos-based lifestyle content creator. Her content usually includes lifestyle vlogs, fashion and beauty, storytelling and more. She began her journey in 2020, when she started posting consistently and building her personal brand. She is also heavily involved in editing and direction of her own content, which makes her content feel effortless.

Lucy Benson

Photo: Instagram

Lucy Benson a Nigerian fashion and lifestyle content creator built the space around her self-growth in a way that feels structured, honest, and deeply personal. She began to gain attention during the early 2020s when social media platforms like tiktok and instagram reels started becoming the main discovery platforms for new Nigerian influencers. She is now known for her visually driven fashion content.

Kamsi Nnamani

Photo: Instagram

Kamsi Nnamani is a Nigerian YouTube, fashion, and lifestyle content creator, known for her peaceful, aesthetic, and intentional living. She began her YouTube journey in the mid 2010s when she started with beauty and makeup related content before evolving into full lifestyle vlogging. Her content blends soft living with structure making her one of the creators people learn from.

One unique thing about this wave is how close creators feel to their audience, comment sections now often feel like conversations.

The Nigerian IT Girls are not trying to fit into an international standard from outside the country rather, they are focused on building their own version which reflects their environment, personality and everyday reality making it relatable to audiences.

Lifestyle

5 Spots in Lagos to Reset for the Weekend.

Published

6 days ago

5 June 2026

Destiny Echobu

Photo: Instagram

Lagos is a city known for its hustle energy. From early morning traffic to late-night hustle, leaving you drained by the time Friday arrives. Most people are just trying to finish last-minute plans, wrap up the week and recover from the pressure. But hidden within the chaos are several places where noise fades a bit, where you can slow down without leaving the city.

Here are some spots where you can give your weekend a proper reset.

Lekki Conservation Centre.

Photo: Instagram

If you just need a shift in energy Lekki Conservation Centre is one of the easiest choices. Once you step into the entrance the noise from the highway drops and suddenly you’re surrounded with tall trees and quiet paths that makes the city feel like it’s miles away.

Walking through the canopy bridge gives you a different perspective not just to the environment but also to your own pace. The surrounding naturally slows the mind without effort.

Tarkwa Bay.

Photo: InstagramTarkwa Bay feels like a quiet escape from the rest of the city. The boat ride alone makes you disconnect from the city, the noise has faded into something quieter.

The beach is calm with soft waves and people simply enjoying the space without rushing anywhere. It’s very easy to forget the busy parts of the week here.

Nike Art Gallery.

Photo: Instagram

Nike Art Gallery offers a different kind of calm energy. The environment itself makes you feel relaxed, even if you’re not into art. The gallery has a way of calming your mind.

It’s a quiet space filled with many colours and stories that naturally slows your pace as you walk through the gallery. Just a short time here leaves you feeling mentally lighter than when you came in.

Freedom Park.

Photo: Instagram

Freedom Park carries a mix of history and openness. It feels more like a place where people come to unwind.

It’s one of those places where you can sit for a while without feeling like you need to be somewhere else. Sometimes there are performances or small gatherings, but even on quiet days, the park still holds its calm identity.

Oniru Beach.

Photo: Instagram

Oniru Beach doesn’t feel far from Lagos, but it simply gives you a softer version of it. The sound of the waves blends with background music, conversations and laughter from different groups of people.

You can sit, eat, talk, or just watch the shoreline without thinking too much about the week that just passed. It’s suitable for just letting the week slide off slowly.

At the end of it all Lagos doesn’t really slow down for anyone, you just learn how to find small pauses inside it. And once you do weekends starts to feel like they actually belong to you again.

Lifestyle

“I’m a Whole Ecosystem” Venita Akpofure Shares Dreamy Indonesia Vacation Photos

Published

2 weeks ago

29 May 2026

Ene Unazi

Photo - Instagram

Venita Akpofure is currently vacationing in Bali, Indonesia. The reality star and actress took to her Instagram page to share a series of pictures with the caption: ”Some people are a phase. I’m a whole ecosystem. The Phase of the Red Unicorn: Intricately made, beautifully rare, deeply aware that not everyone qualifies for this altitude. Sitting on a level matched by none. A little exotic. A little celestial. A little “please remain behind the velvet rope.”

Photo – Instagram

Bali is described as the “Island of Gods” with its thick Ubud jungles, volcanic landscape, and rolling terraced hills. Surrounded by lush greenery, Venita posed barefoot inside a woven bird’s nest structure overlooking the valley. Behind her, the lush green scenery contrasted beautifully with the flowing train of her red dress.

Photo – Instagram

She wore a vibrant cherry-red floor-length dress featuring a plunging neckline and a high thigh slit. Bright pink floral tassel earrings and metallic bracelets, while her bone-straight hair was parted neatly down the middle.

Photo – Instagram

Earlier in the trip, Venita shared moments from some of Bali’s popular island activities, including walks through the rice terraces, dining experiences, and visits to scenic photo spots such as the Floating Koi boat at Swing Heaven Ubud Park.