Having the necessary confidence when it comes to sexual pleasure is what everyone must have. Low sexual confidence can affect one’s bedroom performance and intimacy. Great sex is possible when you are bold and can satisfy your partner perfectly. If you lack confidence, here are some ideas on how to own your pleasure and make your partner happy sexually.

Avoid Negative Thoughts

Our thought processes affect our behaviour. Having negative thoughts or discussing unhelpful things can limit our sexual confidence. You need to speak positively into your life to increase your happiness, and this will make you better in the bedroom. If you keep seeing the bad aspects of your life and keep downgrading yourself, it will affect how you experience pleasure. Always check your thoughts and speak positively into your life to increase your self-esteem.

Have a Clear Head in the Bedroom.

Being mindful makes you enjoy every time. Those who go into intimacy without a clear head often find it difficult to have a good performance. When in the bedroom, be mindful of everything around you from touch, light, and sensation.

Better Communication

There is no way you can be confident in the bedroom without improving your communication. Excellent communication between sexual partners has been linked to better sexual practices. Transparent communication with your partner will let them know what will make them better. Pleasing each other becomes easier when everyone comes clean.

Spice Up Your Sex Life 

While traditional ways of romance and sex remain common, practising other sexual activities can increase your confidence. Ask your partner if they are happy to try other sexual styles and positions to make them happy. Different sex toys could make you and your partner have an unforgettable time together.

Read Also : The Orgasm Gap: Why It Still Exists and How to Close It

Take Care of Your Health

Being in good health will make you feel more confident in the bedroom. People suffering from depression, high BP, anxiety, and other health challenges often lack the confidence to perform well in the bedroom. You should eat well, engage in regular exercise, have enough sleep, and see your doctor at least once in six months. This will go a long way to increasing your confidence.

Avoid Unrealistic Expectations

One of the ways to increase your sexual confidence is to avoid perfection. Many people have unrealistic expectations about themselves because of what they watch on television and stream on social media. Try to be yourself and avoid thoughts that preach perfection in the bedroom.

Final Thoughts

Everyone deserves to be confident when with their partner. This will allow them to have better sexual connections and performance. You should communicate more with your partner, have a good health routine, and avoid perfection if you want to experience great sexual performance.”

Let’s talk about it. Openly. Honestly. Like real people.

The orgasm gap is real.

It’s the fact that in heterosexual relationships, men tend to reach orgasm more often than women consistently.

Study after study backs it up. In one, 95% of men said they “usually” climax during sex. For women? Just 65%. That’s a big gap.

And it’s not just about pleasure, it’s about fairness, connection, and feeling seen.

So, why does this gap still exist in 2025?

Let’s break it down, simple and honest.

1. We Still Treat Male Pleasure as the “Main Event”

Let’s be real: from movies to music to social media, the script of sex often centers on male satisfaction.

The build-up is about him. The finish is about him. And once he’s done, it’s assumed “sex is over.”

That mindset? It’s outdated. And unfair.

Because it teaches everyone especially women to shrink their expectations and just “enjoy the moment” even if they don’t finish.

2. Many Women Feel Afraid to Speak Up

Too many women are taught to prioritize the other person’s needs in bed,

not their own. Some fear being judged. Some don’t want to “kill the vibe.” Others have simply never had a safe space to explore what they like, let alone ask for it.

And let’s not ignore the cultural and religious influences that shame female sexuality or label women who know what they want as “too much.”

3. Not Enough People Understand the Female Body

Let’s just say it: the clitoris isn’t a mystery, it’s just ignored.

Vaginal penetration alone doesn’t do it for most women. But because of poor sex education, many partners still believe the lie that “in-and-out” equals pleasure.

Real intimacy means taking time to understand her body, not assuming one move fits all.

4. Sex Is Often Rushed

Between work, stress, and responsibilities, people rush sex like it’s another task to check off. But most women need time, emotional, mental, and physical, to really get in the mood.

Quickies can be fun, but when that’s all there is, real satisfaction suffers.

So, How Do We Close the Gap?

1. Talk. Really Talk.

Have honest, no-shame conversations about what feels good. Ask questions. Listen. Communicate during sex, not just after.

2. Prioritize Foreplay Like It’s the Main Dish

Not an appetizer. Take your time. Explore. Be curious. Foreplay is not a “pre-game” for many women, it is the game.

3. Normalize Sex Ed for Adults

We all missed something growing up. Read. Watch. Learn. Ask questions. Knowledge is sexy and powerful.

4. Drop the Performance, Embrace the Experience

Sex isn’t a show. It’s connection. Some nights it’s wild, some nights it’s soft, some nights it’s just holding each other. And that’s okay.

5. Make Female Pleasure a Shared Goal

Not a bonus. Not a maybe. A goal. When both partners are fully seen and fully satisfied, sex becomes something sacred. Not just physical, emotional and healing too.

Conclusion

The orgasm gap isn’t just about sex.

it’s about the space we give (or don’t give) women to own their pleasure, speak their truth, and be centered in the story.

And closing it? It starts with care. With listening. With unlearning.

It starts in the bedroom, but it’s a mindset shift that touches every part of how we love, respect, and relate to each other.

Because pleasure isn’t selfish.

It’s human.

And everyone deserves to feel it, fully.

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Every form of relationship, whether romantic, friendship,or family relationship are bound to pass through some challenges. However, it is not these conflicts that defines our relationship but how well we are able to navigate the storm with understanding, patience, and commitment.

Facing relationship problem does not mean the end of a relationship. Instead, it’s a signal that your relationship can become better and stronger. Here are few effective ways to get past relationship problems and rebuild stronger bonds:

1. Practice Honest Communication:

One of the ways to get past through relationship hurt is to practice constant and honest communication. Don’t assume that your partner knows your feelings, needs and concern. Communicate about everything. Also do well to listen to your partner with an open heart. Don’t make your partner feel less of themselves simply because their concerns have been communicated to you.

2. Identify the Root Cause:

Most problems in relationship are symptoms of an underlying issue such as past trauma, lack of trust and the likes. Instead of tackling the surface issue, be wise enough to find out the underlying issue and tackle it.

3. Take Responsibility:

Take Responsibility for your actions and do not play the blame game. Recognize your mistakes; do well to address them and to tackle them head on. Resist the urge to passing the blame and refraining from taking charge.

ALSO READ:6 Ways to Build Trust in a Relationship

4. Seek to Understand, Not Just to Win

When having a conversation with your partner, always seek to understand the standpoint in order to deal with the issue rather than seeking for how to win the argument. Seek to understand, rather than to win. Seek to come to a resolution, instead of trying to prove a point.

5. Give Each Other Space

Sometimes, taking a step back allows for better judgement and encourages reflection. Emotions may cloud judgement so allowing a breathing space helps a lot.

There is no perfect relationship. Yet, virtues like love, empathy and consistent effort can mend the deepest cracks in any relationship.