From childhood to adulthood, we’ve been taught so many ideas about love and relationships—through our parents, religious teachings, cultural norms, and Nollywood. Some of these beliefs are helpful, but many are myths that lead to confusion, pain, and unrealistic expectations. In Nigeria, where love and family are held in high regard, it’s time we start unlearning the relationship myths we grew up with—and replace them with healthier truths.

“True Love Conquers All”

We grew up hearing that as long as you truly love someone, everything would somehow work out. But in reality, love by itself isn’t always enough. You can love someone deeply and still struggle with communication, clashing values, financial stress, or personal growth. Thinking love fixes everything can make you overlook real issues that need to be addressed. Yes, love is the foundation—but it needs honesty, respect, and effort to thrive.

“Marriage Is the Ultimate Goal”

In Nigerian society, Marriage is often seen as a final achievement or prize. Once a woman reaches a certain age, family members start asking, “When are you getting married?” But the truth is, marriage is not the end goal of life. It’s a journey shared with another person, not a final stop. Rushing into marriage to meet expectations or or avoid pressure can lead to unhappy unions. It’s okay to focus on personal growth, build your career, or take time to heal before choosing a life partner.

“You Must Marry Within Your Tribe or Religion”

This myth still persists in many homes. Some families believe love should only happen within your tribe or faith. But love often defies those boundaries. People from different backgrounds can have strong, happy relationships if they share the same values and are willing to respect each other’s differences. While family input is important, your happiness and peace should come first. Love should be about connection, not just culture.

“One Person Must Always Lead”

Traditionally, we’re taught that the man leads while the woman follows. But in today’s world, a relationship should feel like teamwork. Decisions should be made together, with both partners feeling heard. Whether it’s finances, parenting, or life plans, both voices matter. Respect and understanding make relationships stronger—not control.

“Jealousy Means You Care”

Many people mistake jealousy for love. Some believe if their partner isn’t jealous, then they must not care. But jealousy often comes from fear and insecurity, not love. Monitoring phones, interrogating, or arguing over harmless friendships can damage trust. Real love is built on trust, not control. If something is bothering you, have an open conversation instead of jumping to conclusions.

“Stay No Matter What” vs. “Leave at the First Fight”

We’ve often been stuck between two extremes. Some believe you should stay no matter what—even when it’s toxic. Others think that any problem means it’s time to leave. But the truth lies somewhere in between. Not every argument means the relationship should end, and not every relationship should be saved. The key is learning to tell the difference. If the issues are fixable, work through them together. If the relationship becomes harmful, it’s okay to walk away.

How to Unlearn These Myths

Unlearning doesn’t happen overnight. It starts by asking yourself where your beliefs came from and whether they’re still serving you in a healthy way. Talk with people you trust about what you’re discovering. Watch couples who have balanced and honest relationships—not perfect couples, but real, emotionally honest ones. Set clear boundaries for what you want in love, and communicate them with your partner. Listen more. Talk openly. When you both navigate conflict or tough conversations with more care, celebrate those moments.

Love is beautiful—but to truly enjoy it, we must unlearn the myths we’ve been told.

The truth is, every relationship is different. What works for others might not suit you—and that’s perfectly fine.

By letting go of beliefs like “love conquers all” or “marry before you run out of time,” you give yourself a better chance at finding real, lasting happiness. Choose what works for you.

Build a love that fits your heart—not just society’s script.

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Lagos is a vibrant city where music, food, and nightlife all meet in ways that become etched in the memory. Whether visiting as a tourist craving local cuisine or a foodie seeking higher-end dining or rooftop bars, Lagos offers a mix of high-end and laid-back spots to explore. Below are the best bars, restaurants, and lounges you should know as a first-time traveler.

Shiro Lagos (Victoria Island)

Shiro Lagos is an Asian restaurant and lounge renowned for its breathtaking architecture, high ceilings, and oceanfront dining. The ambiance is a blend of serenity and sophistication, perfect for romance and fine dining. Sushi platters, dim sum, and Thai curries are accompanied by their signature Lychee Martini cocktail. Shiro is transformed into a lounge in the evenings, with DJs and high-end crowd gatherings the norm.

NOK by Alára (Ikoyi)

A sophisticated African restaurant located in the trendy Alára concept store, NOK by Alára boasts beautiful art, fashion, and food fusion. The revamped Nigerian favorites on the menu are pounded yam croquettes, goat meat confit jollof rice, and tamarind-glazed suya. The NOK Garden nearby is ideal for alfresco cocktails and Afrobeat nights under the stars.

Zaza Lounge (Victoria Island)

Zaza Lounge is where one finds glitz and glamour hunters for nightlife. Comfortable seating, neon lights, and an upscale crowd place Zaza in the luxury dining category with entertainment. There is a small chops selection, seafood platter, and complete wine and cocktail list available. Celebrities DJs, parties, and a busy dance floor are here on weekends.

The House Lagos (Lekki)

The House Lagos is a multipurpose social house that has a restaurant, lounge, and co-working space. It is a hotspot for creatives and professionals in Lagos. The menu features continental and Nigerian cuisine, including their spicy grilled chicken wings, yam balls, and seafood pasta. Open-mic nights, wine tasting, and cultural themed nights are also hosted at the House.

Hard Rock Cafe (Victoria Island)

Located right on the Atlantic coast, Hard Rock Cafe Lagos offers an American classic menu of food with a rock-inspired atmosphere. Outdoor seating with ocean views, and indoor space with music memorabilia decor, make the restaurant party-friendly and family-friendly. Burgers, ribs, and cocktails like the Hurricane are signature food. It is a fun spot with live bands and karaoke nights.

Bogobiri House (Ikoyi)

For a more cultural and bohemian experience, Bogobiri House is an art-center lounge and boutique hotel. It features native Nigerian food—i.e., egusi soup, grilled fish, plantains—accompanied by live jazz, spoken word poetry readings, and art exhibitions. The wooden, earthy decor and Afrocentric ambiance make it a unique stop for any traveler.

RSVP Lagos (Victoria Island)

RSVP is a trendy American-style restaurant with a best-kept secret: the “Pool Club,” a lounge in the back of the restaurant that has a pool, DJ, and fashionable seating. The restaurant offers gourmet food like steak, truffle fries, and artisanal burgers. The Pool Club is a sophisticated daytime brunch environment that transforms into a party lounge environment at night.

Sailors Lounge (Lekki)

Situated on Lagos Lagoon, Sailors Lounge is the city’s lone floating bar. It’s a relaxed, laid-back venue to sip sundowners and unwind in the evenings. Guests enjoy cocktails like the “Drunken Sailor,” barbecue seafood platters, and comedy shows or live music. It’s an ideal venue to catch the sunset amidst local charm.

Bature Brewery (Victoria Island)

Nigeria’s first craft brewery, Bature Brewery is a laid-back hangout with locally brewed beers like their “Lagos Lager” or “Black Gold Stout.” Tacos, burgers, and plantain chips are also available at the taproom. There are open mic nights, art exhibitions, and Afrobeat music concerts to make it a trendy destination for travelers looking for a real and socializing experience.

The Observatory (Lekki)

A rooftop find tucked into Lekki Phase 1, The Observatory is all about the view. Warm lighting and urban atmospheric feel make it perfect for dinner dates and soirees. Their cocktails are innovative (order the “Lagos Sunset”), and dishes range from lamb skewers to seafood pasta, to chicken tacos. Lounge, bar, and fine dining mixed together.

Final Thoughts

Lagos is a city that does not sleep, and neither does its nightlife and food. With floating bars and rooftop lounges, art spaces and fine dining restaurants, each venue provides a different experience of the city. Whether you are looking for strong Nigerian flavors, elegant cocktails, or a soulful cultural night, these venues are must-visit places that embody the spirit of Lagos.